The Crystal Chamber

(Copyright 1996 by C. Pickover)

Welcome to the crystal chamber in which you are asked questions by God to assess your intelligence. There are numerous biblical examples where God asks humans questions, starting with the book of Genesis where God asks Adam, "Where are thou?" after Adam and Eve eat the forbidden fruit and hide themselves in the Garden of Eden. I would be delighted to have your answers to these questions, but even more delighted to have you contribute questions or suggest modifications to the following. Please contact me with your responses. The more witty, profound, and mind-blowing your question, the better. (I do not wish to offend anyone by using the term "God". If you wish, substitute the word "powerful being".)




God says,"If you request it, I will tell you whether I am real or merely the result of abnormal electrical activity in your brain's temporal lobes." What is your request?

God says, "Can you go to sleep in a dream?" What is your answer.

God says, "What is better for humans -- people who won't break the rules or people who will break the rules?"

God comes up to you and asks, "If you request it, I will increase the natural life span of humans to 1000 years. Will you make such a request of me?" What is your answer?

God comes up to you and asks, "What can I do to make you believe that I am God?" What is your answer?

God comes up to you and says, "Do you wish to know if there if life after death?" What is your answer?

God comes up to you and says, "I can give you control over your dreams at night and make them as real as your experiences in life. Would you like such a power?"

God comes up to you and says, "What is the most profound question you can ask me?"

God says, "I will give you the ability to speak and understand a thousand languages, on the condition that every other human will acquire the ability to understand ten languages. Do you accept my gift?"

God says, "I will give all humans the ability to turn water into wine and stones into bread, if you request it." Do you request it?

God says, "You now have five senses. I will give you another sense each day for a year, if you request it." Do you request it?

God says, "I will give you unexcelled sensual union tonight with a being of your choice; however, the being must be from another world." Do you wish to accept this gift?

God says, "Which will give you more pleasure? Lightning bugs could twinkle in colors. Humans will speak kind thoughts whenever they have them."

God says, "Which will give you more pleasure? Sunshine could cure cancer. The shadows of humans can do half of humanity's work. For example, the shadow of a gas station attendant can pump gas while the attendant works on another car."

God says, "Which will give your more pleasure? You can bottle time and save it until you need a little extra. Every human gets four loving hugs a day."

God says, "Which will give you more pleasure? Photographs and memories stay vivid through the years -- or all rodents will attain human-like intellectual abilities for a week, finally allowing us to converse as equals with another species. (Imagine the profound effect on humans to be able to 'see' the world from another being's point of view.)"

God hands you two books. "Which do you prefer to keep?" Each page of the first book contains the words "This page intentionally left blank." Each page of the second book contains the words "This page not intentionally left blank."

God says, "I will give humans one of the following gifts. Which do you choose? I will give everyone unlimited money, or give the world everyone unlimited energy, or everyone unlimited information."

God says, "Which do you prefer: being a rich person in a poor country, or a poor person in a rich country?"

God says, "Which do you prefer: being a dog who looks human, or being a human who looks like a dog?"

God says, "Some philosophers suggest God created man, and other philosophers say man created God. Which scenario gives the best chance for a fulfilling afterlife?"

God says, "Which do you consider a greater punishment? Every time you cough, someone within a fifty-mile radius from where you now stand will die. Every time you laugh, someone at random on Earth will die."


I welcome your own questions and answers. Please pass along your comments.


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